Day 16 of 21 Days of Healing: Get a Bigger Bucket

Posted: November 22, 2014 in Uncategorized, When Church Hurts
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God delights in you. (Brain work.)

Day 16

By now, you probably have figured out what’s coming today. Yep, that’s right. What are the big things you want to do?

All my life I have wanted to see the Grand Canyon. Guess what? Last spring we went. The Grand Canyon, Zion National Park, Arches National Park, The Petrified Forest, Sedona, the Rocky Mountains and much more. What beauty! What majesty! We were awed. And delighted. We came home with something like 14,000 pictures between our camera, phone cameras, and two iPads. Absolute splendor.

Next, I think we are going to go south because it will probably be during my spring break. And then east. I attended a conference in Washington DC when I was in college and when my son’s choir toured through Ohio, Pennsylvania, and up to Maine, my husband and I were chaperones. But there was little sight-seeing and I really want to visit the historical monuments and Civil War sights.

Also on my list are the redwoods in California, Glacier National Park, Nashville, and Niagra Falls. That’s a bit of my traveling list.

Other things in my big bucket are:
Write a book.
Build a greenhouse.
Finish quilting my grandmother’s quilt tops.
Become a master gardener.
Start a business.

I always thought I would have to wait until I retire to work on any of these projects, but now I can actually work toward them or even on them. My world has opened up in so many ways without the hundreds of hours per year we were spending at the church.

Now, I’m not saying that if you are still involved in a church and are volunteering and giving, that those are bad things. No, no, no! They are wonderful things. But if, as part of the abusive environment you were in you were like me and the volunteering and giving were so extreme and so “expensive” that you lost yourself – because really, if you don’t have money or time to live the life and do the things you dream of doing, reasonable things that lots of other people at your church have been doing for years because they didn’t have to measure up to the extreme standards expected of you – now is a good time to make up for all of those lost years that the locusts have eaten.

Even if it’s just sitting on your front porch watching the world go by.

We live in a 103 year old house with a beautiful front porch. We always thought how wonderful it would be to just go out on the porch weekend mornings in the spring, summer, and fall, and have coffee or breakfast. How wonderful it would be to sit there on hot afternoons and enjoy the shade and the breeze. How wonderful it would be to sit out there and read. How wonderful it would be to sit out there.

We filled it with beautiful outdoor furniture. That never got used.

Ultimately, for many, many years, we never had a Sabbath. Because we worked on Sundays. And while the church staff got Monday’s off for their Sabbath, we went back to our weekday jobs.

I know that porch sitting might sound like it should go in the smaller bucket list. But it’s on my big one. And I’m keeping it there.

What’s on your big bucket list? Why don’t you start making some plans to do one of those things or, better yet, just get out there and do it?

I guarantee that it will bring to you a measure of healing.


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